
If I Could Make it There, I'd Make it ANYWHERE!
Ugh Im so angry at you New York! You have made it very very clear that you want the poor to suffer and just leave the city. How dare you! Youre supposed to be the city of opportunity and give people hope for success. You are disappointing me. Youve done nothing but pick on people.
So you put the ban on gay marriage, whatever, there will come a time when you will hang your biased discriminatory head in shame for that one.
You raised the price of transportation yet made the service even worse.
Now you are cutting trains, bus routes, and making students all over the city pay for their transportation being fully aware most students in the city are from low income housing, most likely the hopeful to be the first to go to college who cant afford the expensive metrocards and rely on the free passes just to get to school in the first place. You cut that I guarantee there will be more kids NOT going to school, not getting an education, a rise in gang and drug related crime, and theft since they wont have an education to get a decent job.
Not only that but you’re closing about 20 schools in the tri state area. What the hell?!?!?!
Now I hear in the news that you are trying to stop those people who sit on the corners with a table and those large empty water bottles asking for money to help feed the homeless. You are putting a ban on them too?
So, what are you trying to say New York? That you are so overwhelmed with the problems of the poor that youre move is to just get rid of them? Make them end up in prison, move out of the city, or just die?
Look the gentrification of a lot of areas in the city is nice in the sense that it makes the area safer and more cultural diffusion and cool places to hang out but what about the working class minorities that live there? You let the rent go up to a point that they can no longer live there?
*sigh* I dunno New York. You have really let me down. I hang my head in shame of the things you are doing. I refuse to let it get me though. I will bitch you out until the end.
You can be such an awesome city. I have so much fun here a lot of the time but I know despite the influx of people coming from different cities across the US, hell… across the WORLD who are trying to make a name for themselves. There are those who have struggled living here for a while who have no choice but to leave. I know so many who have moved to South Carolina, Jersey, Texas, Florida, Georgia, Chicago, Seattle, Portland, Puerto Rico, I can go on.
And yes, maybe more people come here than leave but those that come here with high hopes are smacked in the face with the reality check of how screwed up our economy is here. They realize its not easy living in New York City and just end up working as hard as they can just to get by. Out of all of those who come here and realize that, only the lucky can stay. The lucky arent as much as it seems.
THAT ALL BEING SAID!! I have been thinking a lot about the silver lining and the adventure of the chase that I am determined to put myself on.
So this all had been bumming me out. Being 34 living at home with my mom in a one bedroom apartment practically jobless trying to have a career in the arts really doesnt help you feel like you are “making it”.
Then, a friend from h.s who is a friend on Facebook, Kristine quoted a line from Sinatra’s “New York, New York”.
“If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere”.
It hit me.
All this time. I’ve been truly confused on where to go with my life. I know I dont want to live here forever but where to go? Puerto Rico? England? Which one? Or, which one first? I’ve been so adamant to leave because of my anger and disappointment in lack of success here that I just want to go away.
Then it dawned on me after seeing that line. Yeah, I can move but my fear is always “What if I move and I fuck it up?” “What if its all a mistake?” “What if I cant do it and my life long dreams of living elsewhere just fall?” It would destroy me.
Then I thought, wait. Ive been without a decent job for years now. I am still singing, writing, acting, doing what I love despite all the bullshit here in New York. I am struggling in one of the TOUGHEST FUCKING CITIES IN THE WORLD AND IM STILL HERE DAMMIT!
That’s right! I am not backing off.
Ive made my decision.
I know I said I would move to Puerto Rico and England, and I will but Im not leaving yet.
If I can make it here, I KNOW I will make it anywhere. If I can break New York and at LEAST get to a point where I can live comfortably here, then I know I can do this ANYWHERE else.
Yes, England is more expensive but if New York cant break me then I know I will be tough enough to work in England.
Puerto Rico is a great place and beautiful, when I go down there, I feel like a million bucks. the comparison of stress is different. I know I can be successful there as well.
So Im not leaving New York! You cant make me! I know I want to live elsewhere in the future but its when IM good and ready and when I feel like it. When I know I have proven myself here, I know its time to move on!
This outlook will help me more so now to figure out what to me is successful. Is it getting a job that pays the bills? Renting an apartment? Or buying one? I think that will be for another blog.