Archive for December, 2009

This is my own personal note to jot down….

December 19, 2009

Im posting it in my blog just because…

Ok, here are neighborhoods in Queens I would considering moving to:

Forest Hills
Jackson Heights
Kew Gardens
Long Island City

Areas in Brooklyn I would move to:(this list is bigger)
Boerum Hill
Carrol Gardens
Cobble Hill
Downtown Brooklyn
Park Slope
Red Hook
Windsor Terrace
Bay Ridge
Brighton Beach
Coney Island

Areas in Manhattan I would move to:
Washington Heights
Murray Hill

I would live elsewhere in the city more than likely but those are pretty much the main ones.

If I WERE to move

December 17, 2009

Growing up I always figured I would leave New York. Now that I have this new determination to stay longer than I had always planned, its fun to think about all the places I would go when I finally feel accomplished and strong enough. Here’s the list of the many places that popped into my head through the years…

1. New York – well duh, Im here but we need a starting off point. I used to want to move upstate though in a small town. There is something about small towns that just seem so communal and beautiful. Like you would know everyone in town and go to town picnics. It just sounded happy.
2. Boston… yeah I know.
3. Florida – when youre a little kid, living by a bunch of amusement parks sounds like heaven.
4. California – when you realize your goal in life is to be an actress, you automatically just think Hollywood.
5. Mexico – I speak spanish, I listen to a lot of latin rock and there was a time when I actually thought I could get a job as an actress in latin soap operas. Shut up, you know I would have been able to pull it off.
6. Toronto – I used to watch Much Music (now Fuse) back then (early to late 90s) it was a pretty cool channel and it made me think Toronto was really cool but then…
7. Montreal – I realized in Canada, Montreal seemed like more fun.
8. England – I think deep down I always wanted to live there but knowing how far it is when you are a little girl scares the crap out of you. However I still longed for it. Still do.
9. Puerto Rico – I love going down there. I love the beauty, the people, the lifestyle, the food, its just so laid back and fun.
10. New Zealand – Dude, I saw Lord of the Rings and when I learned that every single landscape was found in the SAME country! I thought it was awesome. I also love how far a dollar goes there! Jeez its so cheap! I could afford a house down there if I really wanted to. Damn its soo farrr though!
11. Scotland – Scottish boys are sexin’! Scotland also seems like an awesome party country.
12. Spain – Everytime I see a Pedro Almodovar film I wish I was there. I love how you can be in a big city but feel this strong traditional family unit even between people who arent related. I cant explain it, just the culture and it being so reminiscent of my own but with of course a more Euro flair. Plus, it looks fabulous, its not as expensive as most of Europe and I can totally speak the language!
13. France – Omg, I see pics of the architecture and go crazy. I love the lifestyle and the ideas of owning a flat in Paris while acting in some french films is pretty awesome. If only my french was better.
14. Norway – I saw the documentary Sicko and in the special features they talked about Norway. It just seems soooo awesome!

It makes me happy knowing I always dreamed of all these places. It means I can find happiness and success anywhere I am.

Need to say this to get it off my chest…. Tiger Woods

December 16, 2009

Tiger Woods...yeah

Ok before I say anything let me just make this very very clear. I don’t condone his actions nor am I a fan of the tool. However there are certain issues that I need to vent about.

Look, this is an athlete who cheats on his wife. Yeah. Thats really all this is. Why is this such a huge fucking deal?

Like, yeah ok its Tiger fucking Woods so what? Im getting so fucking annoyed with people who are in utter shock when they find out a man has cheated on their wife. Like “OMG this NEVER happens!” Give me a break.

I get it. He was the Golden Boy. The first black guy to be at the top in golf. Is that why this is a big deal? Like really?

People argue its because of how many women and how this whole drama is unfolding. It just amazes me how crashing his car led to all this coming out of the woodworks.

What is upsetting me is now that this all came out, hes actually feeling the need to stop doing his job and hes losing sponsors.

Really? He did what plenty of men do and yet HES the one that is suffering? The dork who plays golf? The dork that if he wasnt famous wouldnt be lucky enough to even get close to the amount of ass he gets now? Does that seem fair?

Im not one of those “hes being mistreated because hes black” people. I wont lie though and say it didnt cross my mind though. However, I had to remind myself about allllll the basketball, football, baseball players that come in all of Gods beautiful colors that are baby daddies to a number of women.

Look, this is what Im getting at. Yes, he is a total tool. Yes its fucked up he cheated soooo much. Yes its fucked up that he actually paid off his wife to stay with him (or so they say). However if you actually believed she didnt know about it youre insane and shes the insane one for even staying at this point. This is a fucked up relationship and he should be ashamed of himself. HOWEVER I find it sickening that there are soooooooo many people out there who do this on a daily basis yet its evident to us all that it has NOTHING to do with our careers yet for some unknown fucked up reason this dude is going to lose it all. I do think he needs to be punished but he has kids people. Hes a dude that thinks with his dinger and he fucked up. He needs to learn from his mistakes but losing everything he worked so hard to accomplished because he cant keep his cock in his golf shorts really seems to be going too far dont you think?

I know a lot of people out there disagree with me and say “No he needs to suffer! He’s a sleazy man!” Whatever, I just personally dont believe what happens off the golf course should have anything to do with your job. Hes lost endorsements cuz of his reputation being tarnished. Im just saying fine, if you are going to tarnish HIS reputation tarnish everyone else’s who have done the SAME DAMN THING. It just doesnt make any sense to make HIM pay. Its not like he beat any of them. He didnt cause damage physically. As far as mentally, any women who is either aware or unaware that their husband is getting that much extra ass on the side and still stays with them I question their sanity should they be totally against it. I say “should they be totally against it” because there are in fact relationships that shockingly enough allow extramarital activities. Is this one of them? I dunno, I doubt it but hey something is going on there that honestly is none of our business.

I wish it was like it was years ago when we didnt know all of this bullshit going on in the personal lives of celebrities. When you didnt know about all the bullshit until they wrote a tell all and you would be shocked out of your pants. How did the world NOT know Rock Hudson was gay? Mainly because he was that good an actor and his life was THAT private. The amazing thing about that is, EVERYONE IN THE INDUSTRY knew he was gay. That to me means, there was a time when someones privacy was respected. What happened to that.

We all want to know everything yet if they were just some random person on the street we would know damn well it wasnt our business. We need to get back to that so I can stop writing these rants on celebs lol.

Negative and Angry Rant with a Very Positive Outlook!!

December 15, 2009

If I Could Make it There, I'd Make it ANYWHERE!

Ugh Im so angry at you New York! You have made it very very clear that you want the poor to suffer and just leave the city. How dare you! Youre supposed to be the city of opportunity and give people hope for success. You are disappointing me. Youve done nothing but pick on people.

So you put the ban on gay marriage, whatever, there will come a time when you will hang your biased discriminatory head in shame for that one.

You raised the price of transportation yet made the service even worse.

Now you are cutting trains, bus routes, and making students all over the city pay for their transportation being fully aware most students in the city are from low income housing, most likely the hopeful to be the first to go to college who cant afford the expensive metrocards and rely on the free passes just to get to school in the first place. You cut that I guarantee there will be more kids NOT going to school, not getting an education, a rise in gang and drug related crime, and theft since they wont have an education to get a decent job.

Not only that but you’re closing about 20 schools in the tri state area. What the hell?!?!?!

Now I hear in the news that you are trying to stop those people who sit on the corners with a table and those large empty water bottles asking for money to help feed the homeless. You are putting a ban on them too?

So, what are you trying to say New York? That you are so overwhelmed with the problems of the poor that youre move is to just get rid of them? Make them end up in prison, move out of the city, or just die?

Look the gentrification of a lot of areas in the city is nice in the sense that it makes the area safer and more cultural diffusion and cool places to hang out but what about the working class minorities that live there? You let the rent go up to a point that they can no longer live there?

*sigh* I dunno New York. You have really let me down. I hang my head in shame of the things you are doing. I refuse to let it get me though. I will bitch you out until the end.

You can be such an awesome city. I have so much fun here a lot of the time but I know despite the influx of people coming from different cities across the US, hell… across the WORLD who are trying to make a name for themselves. There are those who have struggled living here for a while who have no choice but to leave. I know so many who have moved to South Carolina, Jersey, Texas, Florida, Georgia, Chicago, Seattle, Portland, Puerto Rico, I can go on.

And yes, maybe more people come here than leave but those that come here with high hopes are smacked in the face with the reality check of how screwed up our economy is here. They realize its not easy living in New York City and just end up working as hard as they can just to get by. Out of all of those who come here and realize that, only the lucky can stay. The lucky arent as much as it seems.

THAT ALL BEING SAID!! I have been thinking a lot about the silver lining and the adventure of the chase that I am determined to put myself on.

So this all had been bumming me out. Being 34 living at home with my mom in a one bedroom apartment practically jobless trying to have a career in the arts really doesnt help you feel like you are “making it”.

Then, a friend from h.s who is a friend on Facebook, Kristine quoted a line from Sinatra’s “New York, New York”.

“If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere”.

It hit me.

All this time. I’ve been truly confused on where to go with my life. I know I dont want to live here forever but where to go? Puerto Rico? England? Which one? Or, which one first? I’ve been so adamant to leave because of my anger and disappointment in lack of success here that I just want to go away.

Then it dawned on me after seeing that line. Yeah, I can move but my fear is always “What if I move and I fuck it up?” “What if its all a mistake?” “What if I cant do it and my life long dreams of living elsewhere just fall?” It would destroy me.

Then I thought, wait. Ive been without a decent job for years now. I am still singing, writing, acting, doing what I love despite all the bullshit here in New York. I am struggling in one of the TOUGHEST FUCKING CITIES IN THE WORLD AND IM STILL HERE DAMMIT!

That’s right! I am not backing off.

Ive made my decision.

I know I said I would move to Puerto Rico and England, and I will but Im not leaving yet.

If I can make it here, I KNOW I will make it anywhere. If I can break New York and at LEAST get to a point where I can live comfortably here, then I know I can do this ANYWHERE else.

Yes, England is more expensive but if New York cant break me then I know I will be tough enough to work in England.

Puerto Rico is a great place and beautiful, when I go down there, I feel like a million bucks. the comparison of stress is different. I know I can be successful there as well.

So Im not leaving New York! You cant make me! I know I want to live elsewhere in the future but its when IM good and ready and when I feel like it. When I know I have proven myself here, I know its time to move on!

This outlook will help me more so now to figure out what to me is successful. Is it getting a job that pays the bills? Renting an apartment? Or buying one? I think that will be for another blog.

Some positive news and some awesome links….

December 10, 2009

So if you have not yet heard from me, I had a pretty good week already and its already Thursday. There was one thing that was sad though which I will get out of the way at this very moment.

My grandpa (dad’s dad) passed away a few days ago. He was 96. Very sweet man. I never met him but talked to him on the phone a few times once my dad reconnected with us again when I was 28. Loved our talks but he developed dementia and stopped talking on the phone because it scared him. I wasnt close clearly and wish I could have visited but according to family he died peacefully and he and the rest of my family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Despite this tragedy, I actually did have a pretty great week. I feel a bit guilty being so happy about it considering however I need to cherish the joy when it comes my way! Lets go along the list:

1. My best friend Jay got an apartment! Woohoo! He now lives in Bed Stuy. You know it is the ghetto but the misconception is that all of the ghetto is horrible. Its NOT. I actually like his street and area. He lives in a brownstone and the apartment is fucking gorgeous! He gets a backyard, a block away from the park and yay! He actually lives closer to me! My train ride will only be less than an hour instead of an hour and a half. Sure I may have to take 3 trains but its still quick! I cant wait for him to get furniture and stuff its gonna be sweet!!!
2. Jay also got a gig this week. That may be just a joy for him however I sing back up on a few songs so woohoo! I get to perform.
3. I actually sang last night at the gig. It was at The Delancey in Manhattan. It went remarkably well. Friends came out, it was a free show and fun was had by all!
4. Biggest news… I am officially a music editor for Skorch Magazine. Skorch Magazine is this great magazine that is reminiscent of Elle, Vogue, In Style but it caters to women that are not a size zero. Its an online magazine that will soon have distribution so yes, I don’t get paid but hey, I gotta start somewhere no?

Im uber excited about it. I will discuss things pretty much like I do on here, in fact expect some rehashing of already blogged artists. I already submitted my column for January. I also hope I get to go to more local shows, check out artists that are unknown, up and coming, plus size is always a plus, and would love to do interviews, concert reviews, etc. I truly am glad I started doing music reviews on here. Its what got me the job!

Oh check out the magazine: there is a free preview of it but if you want to actually become a reader its only a buck a month on pay pal.

Now while I was in the process of getting set up as the music editor, Cali from Skorch asked me to join and make a profile with If you are someone who LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVEESS style and clothes and really really wants to check out the coolest outfits and websites that sell it, I highly suggest joining this site.

Skorch is a fashion magazine afterall I mean just cuz Im the music editor doesnt mean I have nothing to do with fashion and style. On the Polyvore site, you make a profile and then you can create a look that is all yours through pics and stuff. Its totally free. You click on articles of clothing and whatnot and make a collage of your style picks. Its really cool. I already did mine. Check out that site too. I KNOW I will become addicted to it.

Find me on Polyvore

So far its been a good week, there is more yet to come. I am having one of my TWO Coquito Parties ( I have a small apartment) this Saturday. It should be fun to see friends I havent seen in a while.

Music Review: Aqua

December 8, 2009

Yes, I am seriously reviewing the band, Aqua

Don’t even try to pretend that you don’t remember this band! You SOOOOOO do! No! I will not even hear of it! You do SO! Stifle!!

Ok so yeah I am reviewing this band. I will sit here and tell you quite honestly. I like this band. I really do. As I have said about other bands, I dont LOVE them, I like them.

We all know about the song Barbie Girl. Its instilled in our heads. We cant shake it out even after all of these years.

Btw, mini rant before I go any further: How fucked up is it that when this song came out Mattel actually got all fucking high and mighty and sewed the band Aqua for using the name Barbie meanwhile recently they have used THE VERY SONG in their campaign ads for the bimbo doll???? Like seriously they changed a few words around but its still the same fucking song. What douchebags!

Anyways, Aqua is a band formed in Denmark. They got famous in the late 90s in Europe first with songs like Roses are Red and My Oh My. Very bubblegum eurodancy but fun as hell. I mean if you wanna work out and dance to some songs, I highly suggest them.

Im sorry but Barbie Girl is one of my LEAST favorite songs. Yes, you heard right, I actually like OTHER songs from Aqua. See fellow Americans, you gotta stop that big ole “One Hit Wonder” mentality sometimes. We forget, the US isnt the only country that plays the music haha. Aqua released 2 albums before they split up in 2001. There was of course, Aquarium and then Aquarius…. yeah I know, how original.

Now I know many people are thinking, “Natalia, really? What on earth made you like this band??”

OMG, you HAVE to listen to the lyrics. These types of bands always got me for the sheer silliness of their music. Im not even talking the sound. Im talking the actual songs. I mean lets be honest, that dance beat will make TONS of people dance. Whether they like the song or not. I laughed the very first time I heard Roses Are Red because I honestly thought Aqua was a parody band. Like I thought this band was just a bunch of actors imitating the sound of eurodance music ala Spinal Tap with Metal. Imagine my surprise when I realized this was a REAL band!!

Lene: “Roses are red and violets are blue, honey is sweet but not as sweet as you, roses are red and violets are blyue, mmya neena nefgjwrgowreiowefiljweif dum dee da dee dum dum dee da dee dum dum dee da dee dum..”


I swear thats how the song starts! I almost peed myself. So so so funny! How can I not like their stuff its just a good old time and makes me happy. If you are ever feeling down put on an Aqua song. It will brighten up your day.

Oh but dont put Goodbye to the Circus from their second album. It actually made me cry. I think its cuz I pictured the video and they are all circus performers in the bedroom of a little boy who is dreaming and its time for him to wake up and they are telling him goodbye and they will always be with him and hes crying.

What? I have an amazing imagination and I made myself cry. Shut up.

Ok so I cant pronounce or even spell half the names of the band members cuz I dont think my computer types them, but I will get close: The girl lead vocalist is Lene Nystrom (there should be a slash in the o but I dunno how to do that), The bald guy that sings like a gym rat given a mic is Rene Dif, The guy with the blonde spikey hair is Soren Rasted and the other dude is Claus Noreen…. that was actually exhausting.

Ok so the way the band started was actually by the two guys that never freaggin sang! Soren and Claus would write music and then they met a prostitute named Rene. Yes the big burly bald dude was a prostitute in Denmark… how fucking awesome is that!?!?! They formed a band and called each other Joyspeed and release an album and then Rene met Lene on a ferry where she was singing and got her in the band. They actually dated for a long while and then Lene cheated on him with Soren and eventually married him. (Omg Danish Drama!!!) They would all say that the split was amicable and what not but no one believed it especially after Lene gave an interview in 2004 admitted she cheated on Rene before they broke up he vowed he would never forgive her……

…. yeah so they reunited hahahaha! Yeah they reunited in like 2007 and they put out a greatest hits album and are working on a new album for 2010.

This band made a bunch of videos. Most are down right ridic! However funny as hell cuz they are so lame and weird. However, I needed proof of the Roses are Red lyrics so here is the video. Old as hell but omg, please, just pick Rene’s roses:

Music Review: Apples in Stereo

December 5, 2009

Apples in Stereo

I have to be very honest. I haven’t listened to this band in quite some time. I mean, if they have a new album out I dont know nor am I interested. Its not that I dont like them though. I just lost interest. It happens with bands and my psyche. However I can talk very highly about this band.

If you are familiar with bands like Neutral Milk Hotel and The Olivia Tremor Control, you may have heard of this band back in the day since they were all once in the same grouping, The Elephant Six Collective.

This band is just very catchy. All the songs I have no problem calling “fun lil’ ditties” because thats really what they are. The sound is very nostalgic. You can sense the influences of The Beatles and The Beach Boys in their tunes. Strawberryfire is very reminiscent of The Beatles psychadelic ventures or The Beach Boys and their song, Good Vibrations. You can tell this band knows what got stuck in people’s heads.

The lead singer Robert Schneider has a very nasal sound and I get it when many of my friends think its a but annoying however to me its endearing and works with the songs played. What I love about this band as well is that the lead singer isnt some overly sexed, emo looking hot guy. Its a balding guy that wears glasses, a beard, and has a gut. Every cub or bear’s wet dream! Sorry dudes, the man is straight.

He was married to a time to their drummer Hilarie Sidney. They have divorced and have a child. Logically the line up changed and she left the band. It kinda sucks though because the band did have songs that had her on lead vocals and I really enjoyed them. Since then I havent been a fan of the songs that they have released once she was gone. Im not saying they are good, I just lost interest.

I do know that they eventually joined Simian Records. The reason thats worth mentioning (to me anyways) is because Simian Records is a company started and owned by Elijah Wood. Yup, Frodo himself has a record label. Whodathunkit?!

I used to love the song Energy however on my trip to Puerto Rico this past August, I grew to hate that fucking song. Why? Well picture it: In the mall in Puerto Rico they have these panels everywhere that play commercials over and over and over. Well Pepsi endorses TONS in PR and guess what song was in a Pepsi commercial this summer… yup, Energy. I dunno if it was played here in the states because honestly I never heard it here nor have I seen the commercial since but for a week in Puerto Rico it was PAHHLAAAYED OUT! I can NOT listen to Energy anymore. Sorry dudes, I know its not the band’s fault. I mean hey, when ya need bank, Pepsi is a good way to go. However they really played that shit out!

If you are looking for some up beat, sunny songs that make ya smile. I highly suggest checking this band out. Its worth a listen.

This is a cute video for a cute song haha. The song Same Old Drag from their album New Magnetic Wonder. It has a it more electronics used on that album but still great songs. Check it out!

Music Review: Apartment

December 4, 2009

Yes, there is a band called Apartment

I gotta say this band is really hard to look up. You look up the word “Apartment” logically a picture of a British Band isnt something that pops up. Yet because I am so determined I have found a pic of the band, a video of the band, and yes even a bit of wiki knowledge although I must be honest there wasnt much on them.

British band from London who formed in like 2005. Yeah thats pretty much all I need to know in terms of history. Whatever, all I know is the lead singer David Caggiari has an awesome voice and the sound of the band in general is fun, nostalgic, and rockin’.

The Dreamer Evasive is their cd. I think its the only one they have out right now. I know they have a new single out which is cool but no new album.

David has this vibrato to his voice that reminds me of Martin Gore from Depeche Mode and the sound the band has reminds me of 80s New Wave which just makes me reminiscent of “Da Mode” even more. Its like Depeche Mode meets The Killers…. but in a totally good way I swear! If you like 80s music but also enjoy alternative brit rock/pop then I can assure you that you will enjoy Apartment. Just my opinion. I notice how I will say what I PERSONALLY hear only to be told “Wha? Natalia are you on crack? Where do you hear THAT?!?” Whatever, I swear thats what I hear, deal with it. Hmmph!

My favorite song is Pressures. It just runs the gamut when it comes to sound. Its poppy, then brash alternative, then new wavy, then emo, its just all over the place yet Apartment makes it sound precise and together.

Confusing? No worries you will understand after seeing and hearing the video. This is the promotional video to Pressures. Enjoy.

My Rant on New York

December 2, 2009

I love living here. I dont plan on living here for all of my life but I must make it very clear I am honored to have been born and raised in New York.

That being said I have to tell you have fucking disappointed I am in my state. They voted no on gay marriage today and it truly and utterly upset me today.

I will also go a step further and say that I don’t believe that this will effect me personally. I am bisexual but I dont see myself wanting to marry a woman in my lifetime. Im not saying it wont ever happen, who knows but its never been in my vision.

HOWEVER just because it wont be something I personally think will happen to me it doesnt mean I dont support gay marriage and I have to say I am NEVER going to understand why people look down on Gay Marriage. It has nothing to do with you if you are straight.

I dont get why New York is against it. I mean I know this much: New York City is NOT New York State.

We have a tendency to joke and kid that upstate New York is not really New York however it couldnt be more obvious that it is since its vote overpowered the city.

I just dont get and will never get the whole “protecting family” bullshit excuse. You seriously believe that the gay lifestyle is hindering that? Is that really how close minded you are and small? If anything you should be able to see that allowing gay marriage is saying you believe that love is something soo big it surpasses gender. It isnt that difficult to comprehend. I mean raised Catholic I know for a fact we were told on a daily daily DAILY basis to LOVE ONE ANOTHER. There were no guidelines. So why on earth would you put a guideline on gender? If you are straight then congrats to you! Have a great heterosexual life. Trust me gay people dont give a fuck what you do so do them a favor and mind your fucking business.

The claim that they are protecting marriage is a laugh and a half as well. My uncle and godfather may not have a marriage license but they have been together since I was a baby. I am 34 fucking years old! How many straight marriages last that long nowadays? …Exactly! Stop being hypocritical and look at things realistically. Most marriages end in divorce no matter the gender. So deal with that instead of looking for a scapegoat!

Gays dont endager the family unit. To be quite honest I think its fabulous when gay couples have families. Most gay couples adopt. How is this a BAD thing?!?!? Do you know how many children are out there without parents who love them. How many STRAIGHT people give up their children for adoption? Here are gay couples who want to show these children love and you are trying to stop that? What kind of hearts do you have to stop that? If you really think they will raise gay kids then you show how ignorant you are. You know thats not true. Many kids from gay parents grow up straight. It has nothing to do with the upbringing, its preference.

Im sorry if I seem hostile, vulgar, and insulting however it upsets me how people want others to be respectful yet they dont seem to realize how hurtful it is to tell a human being they arent allowed to marry people they love simply because they dont follow your own personal belief.

I for one have issues with monogamy. I love weddings, have problems believing marriages last. However thats just me, I say people should get married no matter the gender. They have the right to get married and divorced like anyone else!

New York, for shame. NYC, dont worry, I know you tried. Maybe not hard enough but hell its better than the rest of the state.